Thursday, October 6, 2011

Lost in the World~ Rachell Allen

Kaylee was a bright girl, smart and funny and very pretty. She got straight A's and was nice to everybody. She was popular.

Then her dad started drinking.

At first things were fine. She could still focus in school and did fine. But after a couple of weeks, things changed. He started drinking more and more, going out late at night and coming back early in the morning. He couldn't cook, couldn't go for bike rides anymore, couldn't function. He was out of it. Kaylee would catch him staring into space with a blank look on his face, oblivious to everything around him. Kaylee talked to her mom about it sometimes, and she would call her best friend once in a while and ask her to hang on, saying, "I need to get out of the house."

But things got worse. Her dad's temper was worse than before. A slip-up, a mistake, a comment taken the wrong way, he blew it, yelling and screaming and cursing the heavens. Kaylee would sit in her room and cry for hours, talking to her friend about how angry he was and how she couldn't do anything without being afraid.

At last, the final step. He started abusing her and her mother. They tripped or spilled something, he kicked them. If he was in a foul mood, he would throw plates at them and slap their faces. When Kaylee was late coming home from school because she was asking her teacher for help, he beat her and called her "stupid" over and over again. Slowly, it showed. Her grades went down. She smiled less and frowned more. Gone was her happy laughter. Sometimes she would cry in class, but she wouldn't tell anyone. She loved her dad too much.

Her teachers didn't miss it. She would show up to class late, her eyes red and puffy, her cheek bruised or her neck scratched. But when they asked, she would just say she tripped and fell in the hall or walking home from school. The teachers would call home, but Kaylee's mother would answer and say everything was fine, "Kaylee just had a little accident." Then there would be yelling in the background and she would hang up. They did their best to help her and encourage her, but she would throw her hands up in the air and say, "It doesn't matter, I'm too stupid." Her teachers would tell her that it wasn't so, that she was very intelligent, but she refused to believe them.

Her father had told her that she was worthless, stupid, ugly and weak, and ever so slowly, she had started to believe it.

On September 19, 2003, Kaylee committed suicide. She couldn't stand herself anymore. If I'm not good enough for my father or anyone else, she thought as she choked down a handful of pills, I might as well die. And as she fell into darkness, she muttered, "I'm sorry, Dad. I'm sorry I was never good enough."

*This is not a true story; this is pure fiction. But the one thing that could've saved Kaylee from her father and her death was the one thing she didn't have: God.

Did you know that Rachel would want to be Ferb from Phineas and Ferb?!?!

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