A Word from the Wise (The Wise Being God)

Dear Nadia,

There is a girl in my class who joined my school in the middle of the year.  She has been at the school for a few months now, but she still seems to keep her distance.  I want to be friends with her, so I have tried talking to her.  "How do you like ACE?" "Cute headband!" "I love your belt." She gives short answers then stays quiet.  So, do I just leave her alone? Or should I keep trying to talk to her?

-Be a friend?


Dear Be a Friend,

I honor you for reaching out to this girl! You are living out God's
command to "be openhearted to your [sisters]" (Deuteronomy 15:11).
Maybe one thing you can do each day is ask her how she is doing or how
her day has been. If you consistently are showing her you care, she
will be blessed by it even if she does not show it.

Also, ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. If you are alert and listening
for his promptings, He can lead you into conversations beyond anything
you could have planned. Ask Him, and He will give you the perfect
words!

You are being Jesus to her, and I know he is so proud of you and
honored by even the littlest things that you are doing for Him! Keep
it up - "for you are the light of the world" (Matthew 5:14)! May He
bless your efforts!

So Shy~ A Poem by Hogan Stevens

Quiet. Alone.

Always feeling out of place.

Afraid. Nervous.

Trying to hide her face.

She is so shy, self conscious,

not sure how to blend in.

Never talking, off alone

wondering how to make friends.

Don't judge her or

mistake her for rude

She's just timid,

not sure what to do.

There is laughter

underneath all her quiet.

She has a voice,

wants so badly to use it.

Will you be the one?

The one to set her free?

The one to befriend her,

choose to truly see?

Will you be the one?

Did you know that Hogan was saved when she was eight years old?!

A Word From the Wise (The Wise Being God)

Dear Nadia,

 I'm a shy girl and I'm not very good at starting conversations with the girls at my church. Do you have any tips on how to start a conversation with them?

 ~ Ice Breaker


Dear Ice Breaker,
An amazing thing about making friends at Church is that you already have the greatest common point you could ever share - your faith in God! I know it might feel uncomfortable to use that as a topic of conversation at first, though. One great way to break the ice is to give sincere compliments! Complimenting a girl on her cute outfit or on an awesome youth group sharing brightens her day and may open doors to more topics. Asking questions also stimulates conversation. Breaking the ice can be/feel really awkward, but you need to push through the stickiness! You can do it, girl! And Jesus, our Best friend, reminds us: "Let not your hearts be troubled. Trust in God: trust in me also" (John 14:1). Jesus will always remain by your side and you can run to Him - especially when you feel lonely and disheartened (I know how that can be)! He is the Best friend ever! Talk to Him about how you feel and ask Him for opportunities to talk to your Church girls. He will guide you! Even if it seems like something like starting a conversation isn't important to Him, I know it is! Let His Spirit guide you. As Romans 8:14 says (my paraphrase), the Holy Spirit will guide God's children!


Dear Nadia,

People at my school make VERY rude comments to me because I make it known that I am a Christian. Right now, I'm getting sick and tired of gritting my teeth and keeping my mouth shut. I pray as I walk down the hall and pass them, but my mind is swarming with comments to say to them. Help me please!
 
~Tired and Angry


Dear Tired and Angry, 

I'm sorry you're having to deal with these rude comments. Remember what Jesus said? "No servant is greater than his master. If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also" (John 15:20). But that's not it! He also promised "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you" (Deuteronomy 31:6). He also said that He would send us an Advocate - a Helper - who would strengthen us (John 14:16, 15:26). Now I know, that's all well and good, but it doesn't change the fact that these people at your school are bullying you. But I encourage you, beautiful daughter of the King, Take Heart! You are so beloved by Him and He is pleased immensely by your big heart and your faithfulness to Him! He wants to whisper words of comfort, a soothing balm to your soul: "Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad because great is your reward in heaven" (Matthew 5:11-12). It's still hard and chances are, it will continue to be hard. The fact that Satan is putting such effort into getting you down suggests that you are doing an amazing job of shining for the Lord, sister :) Please don't let the criticism those who don't understand get you down! I'll leave you with this: "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us" (Romans 1:1-5).

 

Did you know that Haylie, the editor, gave Nadia the nick name, Noodles?!

Games, Coloring and More: Ideas for Your Next Group Gathering~ Rachel Melillo

It's winter! And while winter can be fun for a while, I certainly realize that frigid temperatures, mushy snow, and gray clouds can get old pretty fast. My friends and I have had a lot of free time this January and since going outside isn't really a fun option—when it's not snowing, it's raining or the wind is so bitterly cold! Here are some ideas for you and your friends to have a good time—without the risk of hypothermia or frostbite.

First of all, games! Seriously, my three best friends and I have made some awesome memories playing cards. Our favorite game is Egyptian Ratscrew (also known as Faces to some). Google some good card games and teach you and your friends. It may take a couple tries to get the hang of it, but press on, cards are easily transported and there are plenty of games that vary in length. Of course, too much of one thing is always a possibility, but there's always other games like Apples to Apples, Scrabble Slam (only about five dollars at Walmart!), Operation, Pictionary, Imaginiff, and so many others! If board games isn't the thing for you and your friends, perhaps one of you has a pool table or a ping-pong table. These can be great time takers. Have tournaments and experiment with fun ways to play these games!

Coloring is always a good standby. Perhaps some people think that coloring is for little kids, but not my friends and I! We love our coloring books filled with Disney princesses, Harry Potter images, animals, and Mickey Mouse. It doesn't take talent to color in a coloring book; no contests necessary to have a fun time. Afterwards, do something with the pictures! What good are colorful pictures if they're kept inside a book? Put some on a fridge, stick them in your locker, hang them on your wall—always a reminder of the fun times you've had with your friends!

Maybe the simple stuff isn't what you're in the mood for? Well, we're all girls here...pull out those manicure and pedicure sets and let your nails have a treat! Who cares if it's winter and you're always wearing shoes. We all know that pretty nails and feet make us feel better about ourselves! Have your friends over for a night of pampering and girl talk. Burn a couple mix CDs filled with positive uplifting music that you can put on in the background while you have a great time with your friends.

Take these ideas, grab some buddies, and have a great time! If you've got any great memories, feel free to share them by commenting below!

Did you know that Rachel has only remember dreams about 20 times in her life?!

3's a Crowd?~ An Issues Article by Lea Sadler

Pay attention closely to this article, because I’m sure everyone experiences this problem sometime in their lives. My best friend and my other friend don’t like each other at all. In fact, one had to leave my birthday party last year because she was too infuriated to forget and have fun. There was no way I could find out the truth of what happened between them, and to be honest it was too difficult to even get a glimpse of what the issue was. All I knew was that they couldn’t tolerate even being in the same room together. Here’s how to handle different situations and maybe even to let up on the issue as time goes on.

Let’s just start with the basics. If you are struggling with this problem, or if you’re one of the friends who doesn’t like the other one, then try to pinpoint the exact moment when you started disliking or noticing that your two friends resented each other. Around what time was it? What was going on at that time in each of their lives? It turned out, one of my friend’s mom was really sick, and it didn’t look like she had much time left. On the other hand, my best friend usually just overreacts to everything. So a sideways glance from one person can set her off because she’ll think they’re giving her a look. Now that I’ve got you thinking about that, put yourself in each of their shoes and see the other person from their eyes. Are they a threat to each other for your friendship? Are they jealous?

 Before I knew it, they started attacking each other by telling me stories about what the other one did. If this happens, don’t automatically believe it or assume that it’s true. They might be offended that you don’t believe them because “when have I ever lied to you? Why don’t you trust me like you used to?” Explain to them that you don’t doubt their reliability, but you have two stories that need to be listened to and considered. Reassure them that you’re as much their friend as you were before all this started. Make it clear to them what kind of position you are in and ask them to think about how they would feel in your place. Once they see what kind of problem this is for you, they might ease up and try to make things easier. If not, maybe they’ll at least understand. And after that, make sure to ask your other friend about it later to hear their side. The least you can do is hear them out, if you can’t come up with a fair conclusion, then move on because that side issue wasn’t between you and them, it was strictly between them. Just because they brought you into it, doesn’t mean that you have to continue being a part of it. Make them work that little kink out together.

So what do you do when it’s a Friday night and you want to have some friends over to watch movies but you can’t invite both of them? You can’t choose one over the other, but you can’t not invite both of them either. That night will be brought up sometime and they’ll both be angry that you didn’t choose them (believe me, I did this and it was the wrong move). So if you can’t choose one, and you can’t leave them both out, there’s only one option left. Invite them both. Before people start doing anything, explain to them that it would mean a lot to you if they could get along for at least one night. If they are good friends, they will realize how hard this is for you and do their best to avoid a clash. You might even ask them to step outside and talk to each other calmly to see what the other one is feeling. This would also be a good idea if there is an argument.

I’m not promising you a happy ending where everyone is living in happy-land but these might be some ways to make things easier on everyone. But hey, if they do make your friends finally like each other, or even just accept each other, then that’s even better J